Shifting in Season: Poem

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The darkness comes once again

To greet us when we are already

Searching for something brighter.

Standing upon earth’s yearly sacrifice

Under clouded sky, we weep

For our own personal sacrifices—

Ones that brought us joy

And ones that brought us pain

Throughout the year.

Sometimes we believe we can

Live up to every expectation

Of a loved one, friend, mother or father,

Yet, reality speaks a different truth:

It says to have no expectations

As nature has no expectations

On its growth, its demise, its surprises.

It is in nature’s imperfection that

We can discover ourselves.

We are not perfect and our

Sacrifices should be made to better

Ourselves, one another, those loved ones.

We cannot honor any one living thing

Nor many, if we are living

In constant denial.

We are always at fault with something,

Always searching for that better way

To love, live, breathe, walk.

The tiniest oak does not seek

For the bigger, brighter of leaves.

It is content being small

And living in itself, it waits patiently

To ascend to see above other trees.

And it does.

In this season,

Let us welcome what we’ve

Never welcomed before—

The vision of seeing beyond

The suffering and sadness,

The faith filled with intentions that

One life can be transformed.

In the storms of distractions

That will follow, let us

Hold our ground, create roots;

Darkness is only allowed in

Where we allow it to be.

From July 8, 2013- Not the One

Always behind, never ahead

Watching others pass you by

You wonder where your life is

Where it’s came from

Where it’s going

On the sidelines there’s a lot to see

Observe the lucky and blessed

Watch those who aren’t fall

Broken and on their knees

Like yourself

You’ve got nowhere to go

No one to help you out

Feeling alone and lost

In a vast mixed up jungle

Where the weeds are high

No flowers to be picked

Shielding hope of all redemption

Of yourself

[I don’t want to be the one on the sidelines

Don’t want to wonder what it’s like

To love another without conditions

To live free of doubt and frustration

I don’t want to be the one chasing dreams

While nightmares hunt me down

Again and again

In a disillusioned time and place]

You keep your heart folded

Neatly in a locked case

No one can see it-

Can find it to make it theirs

Is this how you want it?

To feel so guarded

Do you want devotion?

Instead of devastation?

There needs to be a transition

A way out of the maze

Once forever dwelled in

Break the chains holding you back

Challenge the burdens thrown

On you constantly

Live to defeat them

Rise above everyday expectations

[I don’t want to be the one on the sidelines

Don’t want to wonder what it’s like

To love another without conditions

To live free of doubt and frustration

I don’t want to be the one chasing dreams

While nightmares hunt me down

Again and again

In a disillusioned time and place]

From May 15, 2013- Beautiful Anger

Words of fire
Words of tears
Words of glass

–All aimed at you
Somehow you hear–

Words of water
Words of smiles
Words of silk

–All aimed at me
Somehow I say–

Words of ice
Words of sand
Words of thorns

–All aimed at you
Somehow you reply–

Words of sun
Words of roses
Words of doves

–All aimed at me
Somehow I wonder–

Will it end?
Will it begin?
Will it mend?

–Your words to me
Somehow you see–

A beauty
Beyond my
Lasting anger

[2012]

From May 15, 2013- Hollowed Ground

Standing on
Hollowed ground
Walking on
Never knowing
When it will break

So solid
It seemed
So long
Never knowing
There was a danger

Hidden inside
Never showing
Hidden deep
Never disappearing
Always there every time

Love prevails
Remaining strong
Hope prevails
Never gone
Even when faith is

I believe
In strength
I believe
Never falling
Through the hollowed ground

Shelter me
Love’s embrace
Redeem me
Never fail
Trying to keep faith

Take me
Far away
Take sorrow
Never far
Make hollowed ground solid

[2012]

From May 15, 2013- The Sky is Not Big Enough

The sky is not big enough
To hold all of the stars
That is why some decide to fall
Like the thoughts in my mind
When faith it begins to stall

The blackness captures me
When the light is too much to bear
The midnight clouds enclose me
Like the shadows of my thoughts
Who always speak but refuse to see

Time remains hidden always
Amidst the clouds and stars
I become last when endless moments slip by
They dance around me, confusing me more
I wonder when these moments will forever die

The sky is not big enough
To hold all of the stars
That is why some decide to fall
Like the dreams in my mind
When nobody notices them at all

[2012]

From Apr. 30, 2013- The Flower

Recent poem about feeling single…

Do you see the flower?
The beautiful, fragrant one-
Standing alone among the tall grass?
Do you see the flower?
Whose petals are perfect-
White, reflecting sun so pure?
Do you see the flower?
It’s stem sturdy and strong-
With leaves reaching without a care?

Do you see any other flowers?
Where have they gone?
Perhaps picked by the unknowing-
Oblivious to the fact that there will
Always be one left

Do you see the flower?
That one surrounded by blissful air-
Breathing with the rhythm of the Earth?
Do you see the flower?
Whose roots are buried deep-
Flourishing, thriving underneath
But no one can see?
Do you see the flower?
The one that will wither over time-
If left in place
Untouched by human’s hands?
Do you see the flower?
Its life not eternal-
Its beauty not preserved
The one that will fade with time?
Do you see the flower?
It can bring one simple joy-
Or many, depending

Do you see the flower?
Can you touch it?
Hold it?
Protect it?
Do you see the flower?
Do you see–

The flower?
____________________________________________________________________
Other lines that didn’t quite fit with the flow of the rest of the poem…

What will you do if you choose to have it as your own?
What will you do if you choose to walk by it and let it die alone?

Do you already have a flower? One that’s growing day after day?
Do you want a flower? One that’s not guaranteed a tomorrow?

“Gather ye rosebuds while ye may; old time is still a flying. And that same flower that smiles today, tomorrow will be dying.” -Poem from “A Change of Seasons” by Dream Theater (Originally by 17th century poet, Robert Herrick)

From Apr. 16, 2013- The Burden of Truth

Why must there be
A price to pay
Even when you are trying
To walk away
From the darkness and sin you once knew?

The stain embedded deep
That no amount of rights
Can make clean
What will it even mean
When that stain becomes lost in time?

Sometimes it’s hard to do what’s right
And easy to do what’s wrong
You could never see my game
The way I once saw it
Still- the deadly game I played all the same

I played- hard- until I felt I won
A bittersweet victory I sought and gained
Held on to the power rising-
That high I beheld
Sometimes the kings fall to play jester’s games

That power quickly vanished to pain
Burning, searing, branding my soul
With insurmountable suffering
In which I have grown weak
No longer do I possess strength for the game

It’s all over now
Power drained and I realize I lost
Lost against the burden of truth
But where there’s loss, there’s gain
To bring us closer- to teach us

I pray now it’s no longer
A burden- this truth
Let it shed a light
In this darkening time
So much went wrong- still truth can make it right